I thought I had been going through a sort of death and rebirth over the past few years.  Going back through this blog its  apparent the struggle of birth with all its discomfort, and like a baby, I just don’t want to look back upon it anymore.  I have some ideas for the future. Ive thought a lot about just writing snippets on gratitude, or short notes on moving forward, something positive or rewarding. Just doesn’t feel right in this venue. Too many memories on this blog of how I got here.

So…

I’m mulling over the idea of a new blog to commemorate not just having been reborn, but more importantly that I’m living my new life and about to  take off and soar.

I have a new dog, a standard chocolate poodle named Persia.  She is a delightful upbeat addition to my life.  I’m already learning so much from her.  She’s the best company ever!

I’m very close to owning my canoe, only a few more payments, and Persia and I will be out on the water this summer.  Finally!  Somewhere back in this blog I discuss what being out on water would mean to me.  Well I’m almost there(!), and I have the greatest companion ever  in Persia to share it with.

A beautiful Spanish mustang mare is coming to live with me in a few months, Her name is MP Cinnamon Spice.

She is a bay daughter of Ghost Warrior,  and out of Sequoya’s Creek Shawnee.  I wont be owning Cinnamon, at least not up front. I will be leasing her for two years with a goal of training her and getting a foal from her.  With the decision to lease Cinnamon, my life feels alive and full again.

Some crucial realizations have come to me the past few months.  For one, I am unable to walk away from my horse passion. Its just what makes me tick.  My desires have not changed.  Ive tried to open my heart, mind and soul to other possibilities, but they wain and pale to the machine that drives my love of horses.  Among those realizations I’ve been having are, I want a place with pasture, an age old dream, and  that I love genetics.  I love at least the dream of breeding horses. I’m going to breed I think. Maybe not on any real kind of scale, but I have ideas and direction again. Also my eyes have been opened to coverups, lies and unspoken suspicions.  I wont be fooled so easily again.  Mistakes made were made at a price I refuse to pay again. I will learn from them and turn them into positive guidelines for a successful future.

Its scary to try this again.  But I’m up for it!

So I’ll leave The Pony Expression for now as it is. Wow, that conjured up some emotion.

See ya around.  Hopefully you come along on my next journey and share in the exhilaration of it with me. You’ll have to come along if you want to know what the rest of the story is…. 

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Disclaimer:  first off, this is the first time I’ve ever been over the Alpine Loop of Silverton Colorado.

Heather, Malcolm and I were taking the day off to adventure to Lake City for lunch and back via the 4 wheel drive  mountain pass road called the Alpine Loop which includes Cinnamon Pass and Engineer Pass. There was way too much information to take in about the hot spots along the 4 wheel road journey.  I have tried to remember most of it and validate names and locations, however I may have them out of order.

The idea is to take all of you on this trip with us so that you may enjoy it as we did.  Malcolm was born in Durango and raised in Silverton his whole life. He and his parents have been on almost every inch of the alpine peaks of the San Juan mountains that surround Silverton.  His family owned a jeeping excursion  company for years.  He was an impeccable guide.  Heather has learned much as well  in her ten years in Silverton and gave her own version  and flavor to the trip.

This trip begins at 10:30 am today June 24th, 2011, and ended at 6:30pm. Most of the photographs were taken while the jeep was moving. In other words we were bumping and swaying and lurching along.  Many photos were taken so that you may sit in the back seat with me and experience what I experienced as if you had taken the trip yourself.  This means that there may be reflections in the windows, possibly some blurriness, etc.  Most of the pics are just as the camera took them as there is hardly a place where the panorama isn’t just perfect as captured.

This is a photo heavy post.  I hope you enjoy taking this journey with me,  with Malcolm and Heather as our guides.

Leaving Silverton our first stop was Eureka where the original jail house still stands.  There were once around 500 hundred residents at this thriving mining  now ghost town. That’s the size of Silverton’s now year round residents.

Malcolm and Heather giving us the villain look from inside the old jail.

We passed a couple old mines along the way to Animas Forks, the ghost town that marks the spot where we start up into the passes.

Also along the way Mal and Heather pointed out two cabins that folks currently live in during the winters.  They ski up to them. Check this picture out – can you find the cabins?

Okay  I know not fair, try this cropped version of the same photo.

Now do you see them?  Okay I’ll make a closer cropped version of the same photo.

About now? Yes one is on the far right and the other is up in the saddle on the far left.  The left one looks like a rock almost with a smaller out building  just to its left almost dead center in the saddle.  Now go back and check out the first pic. That’s WAY up there!

After  the mines, cabins, jail houses, and Animas Forks

Animas Forks – this photo was actually taken on our way back down on the way home.  On the way up we drove right through the ghost town but my photos didn’t turn out.  On the way back Malcolm and Heather were discussing the Walsh House. Mr. Walsh who bought the home was the last private owner of the Hope Diamond which he purchased for his daughters birthday present.  Now how’s that for history?  All the way out in the vast primitive mountains of Colorado.  If you look to the middle/right of the photo you will see a building by the road.  Here it is cropped out.

Yep that’s the Walsh House of Animas Forks Colorado.  Amazing!

So then off we go up Cinnamon Pass toward Lake City.  Along the way we spied…

…tundra, flowers, snow and a pool. Then as we managed to traverse to the top of Cinnamon we spied apline tundra and stopped to read the sign that tells about it.

Then more tundra…

…and the top of Cinnamon.

That’s 12, 640 ft!

As  we head down we get a beautiful view of American Basin.

As we drove down into Lake City the terrain changed completely. But before that happened we came to a place called Burrows Park which was renamed White Cross for a strain of white quartz that was found in its natural state forming a cross.  The town had a population of around 300 people, with a post office, blacksmith, and other town necessities.  What you see is what’s left…

A beautiful waterfall running down the mountain face and under the snow.  There are no buildings left in White Cross.

Next we came upon a doe who had no worries in the world as she stood there eating grass until we honked our horn to get her to look up so that I could take her smiling picture.

Before we get to Lake City we pass by the lake (San Cristobal) that the community was named for.

This is tiny section of this huge lake.  If you look real close you can see two kayaks  just at the left edge of the photo. One is red and the other is yellow.

Next stop Lake City and the best calazone’s ever!!

We found a building here that reminded me much of the building I live in, the Benson Hotel.  It’s apparent the architecture that was appreciated in the days these building were built.

After a nice lunch, we were off toward Engineer Pass and the second part of our day long Alpine Loop.  But first he drove through some beautiful  rock outcroppings.

After which Malcolm and I hiked down a short steep path to take a picture of  this water fall that comes out of the side of a mountain.

I cant remember if this was before after the waterfall, but we also stopped to view this rushing river.

Exquisite, yes?

And up we go…

Soon we were seeing sights such as this.  Water running under the snow and then looking up on the other side of the jeep we see this.

Mind boggling  don’t you think.  But wait… we haven’t seen anything yet.  Everything so far as just been a teaser.

Next we come to White Death a mine that was re-named after its demise. Destroyed by Avalanche. This actually may have been before the last pics.. But it doesn’t matter, it’s all breathtaking and awe inspiring.  If Mal were here or even Heather they’d be correcting me for accuracy and chastising me for messing some minute thing up.  They should be tour guides.

Ummm… we start climbing, and if you look through Mal’s jeeps sun roof, you see we are just a spec on this mountain with snow towering over us.  This is late June and this is still a lot of snow for this time of year.

This was my/our view.

This is just before we reached Engineer Pass’s summit.  You think that’s it huh… nope.

Then we received a treat from Mother Earth.  The top of the world. Hold on  to your horses folks, she is breathtaking.

Way over there……….  is Utah!

Heather and Mal at the lookout at Engineer Pass.

The lookout at Engineer pass. No words…

Then back down we go… What more snow?

After a long  bumpy drive down Engineer we find ourselves back at Animas Forks and then past there the beautiful valley that marks home is near.

On the way home we ran across this little guy…  Can you see the marmot?

How about now?

Cute little guy… most locals distaste these critters because they crawl into your cars if you leave parked to hike and chew your wiring.  So there is a feud going on between marmots and man. I’d say from the marmot population that they are winning.
With that we say this was one fabulous day. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.

 

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Two years ago when I moved to Silverton Colorado I planned on buying myself a canoe.  I had visions of  spending many lazy days out on the pristine lakes that we are so lucky to have surrounding us here in the San Juan Mountains.  Then I got caught up with work, then laying low for winter, then the horse thing, then paying off debts… My fishing suffered as did my dream of being out on the water in  my very own canoe or kayak.

I have spent some time researching angling kayaks, canoes and kayak canoe crossovers.  I have to admit I prefer the crossover version of an angling kayak canoe.  The price though I’m not so hot on.  My first preference would be a two seater…options you know for spending quality time with friends and family.  Again cost and size kinda took that idea out of reach. I have to be able to put this thing on top of my car by myself and my car is a small subaru legacy. Unless I can find a used one, I’m not getting my two seater fishing vessel.

So this was my first compromise  – a solo seater and my favorite  crossover kayak the Commander 120.

Gorgeous yes?!!  Her specs are 12′L, 30.25W  with a capacity of 400 lbs, and she weighs 60 lbs.  Just love the lines of this fishing kayak canoe crossover.  It has lines reminiscent of a canoe with the  mobility of a kayak.  At $1000.00 before shipping I’m thinking this one too is not meant for me.

…sigh.

I’m not to be discouraged though..  Look at what I found!

This is the Ascend FS12T Sit On Top Anglers Kayak.  Her specs are 12′L x 31”W, she weighs 56 lbs with a 350 lb capacity.  The best part is with shipping she will cost under $600.00.  She is not as elegant as the Commander 120, but she is still beautiful in her own right.

So the stage is set.   By end of summer 2011 I will have my fishing vessel.  Since I was young I have always wanted a canary yellow catamaran with a silver sale.  Her name was to be CatSing.  Well CatSing never happened because I traded the dream of her for a life with horses.

I’m thinking my kayak will be named CatSing in honor of my happiness, renewing  old dreams, and living new dreams. Susan Catt singing in the breeze and maybe not sailing the sea…  maybe just paddling across a serene lake in Southwest Colorado…

CatSing…

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You may remember Tim Black a long time Silverton Colorado resident and violin maker from an earlier post “Silverton Music Magic Maker“, about “Baby” the child sized violin that he built for a young girl who is growing up in our town.    Well Tim has not been slacking this winter, instead he’s been chasing a dream and a vision for Silverton’s school children.  He wanted to donate one of his creations so that children attending school here would have  opportunity to experience a classical journey through music.  He conceived an idea to build a cello. He had never built one before, and began the journey with little financial support in the beginning, but little by little the town rallied and thus a dream was born.

 

The Dreamer

 

CREATING A FIRST CELLO

By: Tim Black (Guest Author)

I made a mold from the cello I restored back in 2008.

(Origins)

Some modification was required to make the mold conform with standard measurements.

(The Mold)

The construction of this cello was a community effort. My labor and skill was a gift. It was also a gift to me: an opportunity to build a first cello.

(Beggars)

As contributions arrived I collected materials. Venture Snowboards (another artisan presence in Silverton, Colorado) donated a piece of poplar laminate for the back of the cello. The hardwood set that goes into a cello is the biggest investment. Ventures gift freed funds for other purchases.

(Collected Parts)

Completing the form work was the first step. I had thinned some poplar for the sides and created some new tools as I went. Once the form work was complete, I could trace the outline to the plates. I had to get creative in marking the plates for carving because of the limits of my tools. The profiles were marked in the plate halves before they were joined. I had also learned that clamping the glued halves was unnecessary. The glue drew the halves tightly together as it dried.

(Form Work)

This was the first instrument on which  I got to use my new luthiers planes. The edge work and coving was more detailed than previous instruments I had finished with only scrapers.

(Carving)

Assembly required bigger clamps. I was working with larger glueing  surfaces and big pieces to clamp. I had several “clamping rehearsals” to be sure I could place the clamps  fast enough within the working time of the glue.

(Assembly)

(Fitting The Neck)

I was following several currents of thought on finishing when I decided to add oil colors to varnish. The wood was thoroughly sealed and I applied a glaze of yellow ocher. A couple coats of a pumpkin colored glaze muted the bright yellow creating this handsome blonde finish. The result is this fine copy with a number of improvements over the original with a big mellow sound. This cello a gift to Silverton School, should give generations of Silverton children a great start learning to play.

(Pumpkin Glaze)

(Plane)

(Dreams Do Come True)

Tim Black and the Silverton School Cello  A giant contribution to our youth. You make us proud Tim!

 

I’ve heard this instrument sing. I’ve heard it compared to others even its 2008 restored forefather and there is no comparison.  This cello sings deep soulful tunes that carries you away to times and places long forgotten.  An amazing gift to our youth.

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I’ve been amiss in my Thankful Thursday posts.  With building my Rum Felicity and Catt Paw Massage websites there has been plenty of  online creative processing.  That and along with working on a web presence for my friend, Simrat’s online art home, and facebook posts and meanderings  I’ve been pretty busy.

I need though to acknowledge some wonderful things that are happening in my life.  So here goes.

1) I feel so fortunate to be employed by Montanya Distillers.

They are great people with a driving force to succeed.  What other kind of people would I want to align myself with.  If you apply yourself you can’t fail.  Apply myself  is what I am doing and I feel like my employers recognize this and appreciate it.  Yet I have had a couple set backs thanks to San Juan Mountain weather, having to cancel rum tastings in Grand Junction and Montrose last Friday.  Heather and I are suppose to be taking off today to get those tastings done.  I wake up this morning look outside and  argh… more snow!  The Mountains look socked in. I hope its just a dusting and we can make this trip as I don’t want to cancel on these folks again.  This is the first time I’ve been bummed by the snow.  I’m thinking that no more trips planned around the state until after April. Do all my driving this summer and settle back into phone calls this winter.  With that said, I am going back to Arizona first week in April to do tastings there which brings me to my second item to be thankful for.

2) My car is a good little car, but its not a long distance car by any means.  Its wonderful in the conditions I live in here in Silverton,  yet it struggles a bit out on a road.  I worry that if I take it too far from home, I’ll get stuck somewhere and have to call my son-in-law to come get me.  So, I have this Montanya trip planned for April to Arizona.  Its a good gig, worth the effort in the potential income it could generate.  So what did my company do?  They are renting a car for me to take on this trip so that I can get our product established in Arizona.  I know that other companies do this sort of thing… it’s just never been done for me before.  I am so thankful!!  I want this job to blossom for all concerned, I’m loyal and dedicated to the company and it feels good that they recognize something in me and are willing to take a risk on me.   Well its not really a risk… but some folks would see it that way.

This brings me to the third item.

3) Risk.

I’ve been looking at horses for a while now – trying to decide whether I want one or not and if I do, which kind.  Well I settled on the fact that I do want another horse. Its really hard though, because I am in love with a certain kind of horse a certain quality and personality. I’ve been spoiled by the likes of Asad, Kindlewood, and Madrid.  Elegant athletic, comical and loving companions.  These horses knew how to be friends.  They also had a certain beauty and grace that made the heart and soul sing when you gazed upon them.  So as I studied different breeds and individuals I became aware that what I really wanted was something similar to them in type and being.  As much as I admired other horses and types of horses, my heart would start when I came across certain ones.  In the process I tried to buy three different horses and either was turned down or became apprehensive and backed out.  I have a real fear of facing the pain that disease can cause for my horse after the devastating effect Kindlewood’s suffering and death had on me.  I could not bring her son home, because I was too afraid, and he reminded me of horses of the past.  A risk I just could not make myself face. I needed to move forward not backward.  I just could not look upon Pro everyday and not see him , but rather see his mother and her death,  and the loss of his grand sire and grand dam.  Not fare to him and too painful for me.  Heather said it yesterday… Mom, you had to sever yourself from them in order to move forward with a horse.  How profound of her!

So move forward I have…  and this is where I have landed.

Just a gorgeous 3 year old filly named Shades of Gray. A registered Spanish Mustang, gaited and appy.  Definitely my type of elegance and fluidity. I have never liked gray horses.  But I have fallen in love with this girl.  She is appy but she is turning gray which means that she will lose her spots someday and become a white horse.  I see fine China!!

Isn’t Shade one of the most feminine and sweet girls you’ve ever laid eyes on.  She’s a girly girl and I love that about her! I am back to being excited about the future and making plans for how we will live together. What kind of gear we’ll use together and what kind of education we’ll share together.  New journeys… new adventures.

Shade will remain in South Dakota at Don and Terri Harwood’s until June 2012 then she’ll make her journey to Silverton to play with me in the mountains for the summer, learn about human idiosyncrasies like climbing up on her back and such nonsense.  Then she will spend her first Colorado winter on pasture near Silverton.  I’m thinking of bringing her in off pasture in February of each year and boarding her for three or four months each spring where I can take lessons and brush up on my dressage training as someday this is what I want to do with her.  Haute Ecole…

 

Dreams… I want to thank Don and Terri Harwood of Blue Moon Spanish Mustangs for making this new dream possible. I’m so full of gratitude.

4) I want to thank everyone who has traveled this journey with me and have remained good freinds and valuable support.  Those who felt the impact of my experiences and shared their warmth and kindness as we waded through the muck together.  YOU all mean the world to me!

Thank you!

 

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It turned out to be a fabulous weekend weather wise for our Skijoring event.  Below Pete Maisel the event coordinator and long time resident of Silverton is busying himself with fixing a stop watch malfunction.  So our races got of to a slow start on Saturday.  I spent quite a bunch of time walking around taking pictures of  some of the folks who worked so hard to put this event on.   It’s only right to begin with Pete as he is the mastermind and major planner of the event.

Pete owns the Bent Elbow Restaurant and Victorian Hotel where I usually have my summer outdoor breakfast’s. Here you can see some of the race viewers from inside the Bent Elbow.

While we waited on the stop watches to be figured out I found one of our EMT’s, Tiffany sharing some cheer with April another one of our towns residents.  No really they were wishing I would go away.

Looking down our course. The guys who built this course worked steady for two days maybe longer building the jumps and laying snow. We have had a bad snow year and at one point they thought they may have to go out and gather snow to lay down the street for the horses to get purchase on.  Can you imagine in Silverton having to  bring snow in?  I think we got enough though last week that they had plenty to work with.

The horses wait patiently for the us to get the show on the road..

While we waited I went up to the announcers booth to see  how things looked from up there. I was amazed at the great view of our town!

And our day one announcer giving me the evil eye for taking his picture… sorry

Then we’re off!! Isn’t that a hot horse!!

The skiers were on target. Some hit the snow, but they all made a great show of it!

Another fast horse silhouetted by our colorful town and majestic mountains.

When they reached the last and highest jump the skier had to turn quick to miss the crowd!!

This would be George Foster he owns the Grand Imperial Hotel and here he is helping to watch for safety and helping pick up fallen gates and rings from the course.

Remember the hot cowboy from last years skijoring event?  Well here he is again riding Blackjack the 5 time world champion skijoring horse.

More pictures coming in Part ll

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December 30, 2010

Yes we are snowed in today.  I went to the Kendall Mountain Cafe this morning for the best pancakes EVER!  While there I overheard out-of-towners declaring how huge their predicament was. Not being able to leave town, only so much money, so many clothing and no way out of town.  Yep, that’s right the passes are closed!  I heard the howitzer going off this morning shooting avalanches probably to clear the passes.

Yep this is one fine day to be thankful for!  We are snowed in!  I have four massages to give today and that will set me for the weeks income.  Can’t get any better. Good food, warm cozy abode, good work, and as much as it’s a misfortune for the out-of-towners who would love to leave, our town needs you!  We are very happy you are staying.  Thank you Snow God for bringing our little community so much good fortune.  I know oxymoron…  I do feel for the those who are trapped and wish them the  best of luck too.

Below meet Miss Basil she is a small tree that I sprouted from a seed three years ago now.  Her seed was a Christmas gift from a good friend and client in Arizona. She loves her spot by the window and provides many tasty meals with her huge leaves. She also loves being a mommy and has produced several children. I plan to sprout out as many of her kids (this years seeds) as I can very soon for next years Christmas gifts.  I think she gave me over 100 seeds this year.

And here are my merry group of Shamrocks gazing out toward the brightness of the snows reflection.  Most active plants you’ll ever get to know. Very very busy little bees. You can sit for hours and watch them move around in their determined little way.

This is Miss Rosemary after a good trim. She supplied our pre-Christmas party with fresh organic Rosemary dip. She is also my wick monitor and when everyone needs water she lets me know.

Below are a couple interesting no flash shots viewing the snow storm from my window.

And last but not least here are all the Miss Spider Plants.  The one you see the best is one given to me by Heather when I first moved to Silverton but living in the pot with her is my baby.  Baby Spider Girl has been with me for going on five years now and has a ton of babies of her own. She was given to me as a three leaf sprigling. (I know its a Susan word).

I have dug my car out three times in the past two days nothing hard, just keeping it from getting covered as deeply as last year.  We expect 21 inches to fall today.  We’re snowed in and I am soooo thankful for it.

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My baby girl and son-in-law gave me for Christmas my very own powder snowshoes with grips for groomed trails too!!!!  Here I am on top of the snowbank in their yard that was left by last weeks storms. Skirt, tights and all!

Look I’m not sinking!!!  I cant wait to go snowshoeing!

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Here we are some of the girls at last Friday night’s dress up party. (left to right) Karen Hoskin’s  of Montanya Distillers Rum , Judy Graham well known and talented artist and owner of the Wingate House B&B, Maryanne Garvin of Silverton Movement Center whom you all have read about a bunch on this blog, and me.

Hostess, Nicole Barr with her daughter Raelen. Nicole is one of our towns real estate guru’s and  a good friend.  If you want a weekend or week long rental  in Silverton, Nicole is the gal to go to.  Silverton Property Management.

Maryanne Garvin (left) Nicole Barr (right)… or is it Charlies Angels!  Okay girls and this was before everyone made it to the party!  I think they were dipping into Montanya Distillery’s Cocktail a wee bit early…what do ya ll think?

The shoes of the night!  Seamus (left) is Maryanne’s 8 year old son… Modeling my shoes for me so they would get into the picture too.  Thanks Seamus, I appreciate it!  No ones got anything on us Silverton women.  We know shoes!

More of the party and there is that cocktail… cant get enough of  that rum…

Oh it’s me!

umm… and more rum?  There ‘s Mighty Seamus with his mom…  No, no rum for Seamus, but he knows how to party down with the best of us!  Go Dude!

Oops!  There I am again!

After a feast of home cooked goodies brought by all the guests I and a friend – another Susan left for another party being held at the Pride of The West Saloon or better known as the POW.

Yep it’s John Shocklee’s birthday bash and we’re crashing it!

Yep that’s the talk of the town… Shocklee, as everyone calls him has been a long time Silverton mountain man, the real deal, who works up at the Silverton Mountain ski lift.

We’re dancing…

They’re playing…

Get down… Shocklee and Susan!  Susan is the friend that I came to the party with.

Oops! Caught in the act of taking sly pictures of Shocklee and his party goers.  After letting  me know he was on to me, I got to dance with the Party Boy.

What a blast!  All that, and I was home by 9:00 pm.  It takes all kinds to get down in this town and I think Silvertonians have definitely got it down.

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RE-FINDING DIRECTION

(“Direction” – from John Curtin Gallery – by Nicole Slatter – 2008 oil on linen)

Well we are definitely  well into winter around here.  I have to say the snow is still  a powerful healing presence in  my life. I battle with it to get places or to stay dry or warm. But visually  and in some ways sensually it is very opening for that part of me that resides within myself.  I am still grappling with my idea of snow and what it conjures up in my mind.  I still find myself  saying that I don’t like snow, and I really do not like driving on mountain passes in blizzards.  But part of me really does like it – its healing and mystical presence in my life makes me feel cozy and complete inside.  Kinda how you feel when sitting on a river bank, or a mountain top, in a meadow or some other peaceful place of beauty.  Serene…

I feel serene here in Silverton in our wintry wonderland.  I just  have a difficult time seeing this as home. One of  this blogs readers commented on the last post Introspection – Walking The Red Road and brought me back to myself with her insight. See why I write my thoughts down here for all to read? You never know when some sweet spirit will come along to present a new world to journey through and investigate. Thank you My Shiloh Ranch for being that beautiful being in my life.  Your comment made me think past my emotions and desires to re-relate to my true self, I then set out to find other insights that would boost the power within me to be my true self in the face of my recent experiences. Another healing process I guess.

I came along this blog -  Allow Happiness and was pleased at how much beauty there is out there.  Allow Happiness shared a post listing their favorite blogs on happiness and I found them to be fabulous. So wanted to share them here with all of you.  The one in the the list that really spoke to my current situation is the Happiness Blog. Great stuff to think about.  So I am off of my recent introspection of how I got here and am back on what I am finding to be wonderful about being here.  I am also looking at the possibility that my ultimate happiness resides in a very different place  than what I have perceived or desired in the past.  When we think of what makes us happy, we have so many things to weigh that happiness against and those things come from our past as ideals or memories or experiences you want or do not want in your life at present.  Longings that you have nurtured, whether they are truly correct for your ultimate happiness or not. I’m going to do a little experiment on myself this winter. I am going to look to things that are new to me and unfamiliar and seek what within these odd to me things solicits joy from within me.  The first thing that comes to mind is bringing another greyhound in to my life.

(My Greyhound, Future  – 2004-2008 – in her favorite spot – How I miss her!)

Another is bringing Pro back home and getting back into the saddle making project.

(The Hope 1840′s saddle that I plan to build for Pro someday)

For just those two things to happen I am looking at another move and where is that to be?  I’m being pulled South. Toward Bayfield or Pagosa Springs or even Taos, New Mexico.  Taos would put me closer to the Spirits I crave to be close to.  It’s also a long way away from Heather, like 7 hours hours away from her.  There is a town an hour and fifteen minutes North of here called Ridgeway that might just be the ticket also.   The oddity to me here is that I have never considered Colorado a place I would permanently call home. It feels foreign to me to do so and I find myself searching elsewhere for that familiar homey feel.  But maybe I am home.  Maybe having horses in snow is a mystical magical beauty that my inner joy will abound with.  Maybe going camping near the Spirits will be my Church.  I don’t know yet. But I’m going to recreate my optimism for the adventure and see where I end up.

These are some of the things that bring instant sense of joy to me.

1) my horses on pastures

(found at: Western Open Edition Art Prints by Marye Roeser)

2) being near the Spirits

3) being near my daughter

4) my friends

5) being a free agent

6) being intimate with a/my lover

7) caring for and communing with my animal and plant friends

8 ) wearing pretty skirts

9) reading Terry Brooks Shannara books

10) eating breakfast outside

( I think I am going to go get me a breakfast and eat it outside to enjoy our beautiful white magical town)

11) being in control of my happiness

12) experiencing the most subtle beauties in any one moment.

13) creating (anything)

A lot of White Medicine I see here…

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